Difficult to comprehend.

 It is difficult to understand the reasons behind this. 

Painful moments

 IT is disheartening to see this.

New things to learn

 1. Accepting the situation as it is.

2. Time for self care- Study, buy new clothes, shave, trim, look good, time for hobbies, exercise

3. Allow the other persons to be as they are

4. Time for Relax

5. Time for deep work

6. Time for professional work

7. Time for family

8. Develop courage

9. Have patience

Afternoon

 Now some things have started to make sense

1. Success in JEE

2. Initial failures in UPSC

3. Other problems-1,2,3.

Late at night

Man me vicharo ka lahar a rha he.

Mai rok nhi pa rha. Jyadatar wlo negative hi he

Kase roku unko..

Bas ane do.

GOD

 I CALL UPON YOU. 

I CALL UPON YOU.

I CALL UPON YOU. 

I CALL UPON YOU.

I CALL UPON YOU. 

POSITIVE

 THINK POSITIVE

THINK POSITIVE

THINK POSITIVE

THINK POSITIVE

THINK POSITIVE

THINK POSITVE

THINK POSITIVE

THINK POSITIVE

THINK POSITIVE

THINK POSITIVE

THINK POSITIVE

History repeats itself.

 Ye baar baar jindagi me ek hi pattern repeat hota hai. Kai bar hua. Fir mane apne ap ko uthaya hai. Kuch logo ne madad kiya mujhe.

Ek bar mere iit delhi ke dost ne madad kiya tha. Us din kafi sad tha. Aur us sal se ek sal ke age ka din tha jab meri job lagi thi. Us din kafi khush tha. 

Job lag gyi. Tata me naukri krne laga. Fir waha bhi ek samah aya jab kuch acha nhi lagta tha. Upsc ki tyri krta tha. 

Fir prelims nhi hua. Kafi sad tha. Job chora aur bhi ach nhi lag rha tha. Fir nayi naukri mili.

State govenrment me supply inspector ki. Marketing officer bhi ise kehte he. Thoda man me khushi mili. Kam krne laga toh aur bhi achha lagne laga. Fir khushi milti rhi. Sapna tha ki aam logo ke liye krna hai. Ye bate bahut ko pasand nhi ayi.

Aaj bhi nhi ati. Aj naukri ko 4 sal hone ja rhe. Jin logo ko ye bat pasand nhi ati wo mujhse door ho jate hain. Rishte bante bante toot jate hain.

Logo ko kaise samjhaun ki main aisa hi hu. Mai galat nhi kar sakta. Bhagwan se hi puchna padega ki unhone asa kyu muhe banya hai.

Par is bat ki khusi he ki is raah par chlane ke liye madad wo karte rhete he. 

Seene pe pathhar

Kabhi kabhi kisi kam ko karne ke liye agar kaleje pe patthar bhi rakhna pade toh patthar rakhke kam karna chahiye kyuki isime tumhari bhalai hai 

Dukh

 Jab kabhi koi itna dukh de de ki ansu bhi nikal paye aur matha pura confused ho jaye ki isne kasa kyu kiya.... Tab jake tunhe apni asli aukat samajh ati he ki, tum bhagwan ki leela ke samne kuch nhi ho. Sab kuch wohi rach rhenhe. Sab khel unhi ka khela hua hai. 

Man ko bandho aur age badhete raho, isime tumhari bhalai hai.

Today Target

 1. Blo report

2. Speak less listen more

3. Exercise

4. Think positive and share your gratitude stories with 3 friends.

5. Read 5 pages

Learning Day 1-Part 2

1. Listen first. Then respond. Speak less. 
2. Do all things that lift your mood. 
3. Increase your responsibilities. 
4. Keep calm under all circumstances. 
5. When planned, wait, don't hurry and don't be impatient, persevere till you do it. Then you will feel good as something good will only come out of it. 

INNER STRENGTHS

Sometimes one needs to be strong enough to accept all criticisms and slangs thrown at you.

Learning Day 1

 Few more learnings:-

1. Don't take inactivity lightly. Start today and start soon.
2. Walk off when stressed.
3. Do actions that lift your mood. 
4. Ignore some things. 

Some anxious moments of life

 When I read my previous blog, it says to nip anxiety, take actions and then dont care. 

For eg. 1. Study hard. 

            2. Take deep breath and say sorry. 

            3. Wait for the round table conference in future. Act upon it. Then remain stoic. 

            4. Exercise, for better health. 

Failure in eyes of society

I am no Kierkegaard or Nietsche or even Socrates, who is here to comment on the failure and success. I am also not here to give you mantras on how to achieve success in life. For google and other social media are flooded with the advice and suggestions. Sometimes you can watch reels for hours on instagram to get dose of such advices. But let me remind you I am not here for the same. 

I am here because I was seriously introspecting on what is success and failure in eyes of the society? Society is a complex phenomenon. Yes, you read it right. I said phenomena. I am trying to understand this from close perspectives. 

Let us start from the beginning. A child was not tall enough to impress upon the society. One lady in the neighbor called his mother, "Is he not tall enough ?" She raised serious questions on his height as though he was a failure. The mother did not say anything, only doubting, whether her child will be a failure in terms of height. 

The child is none other than me. Today is the day when I feel that how stupid they were, who tried to play with the emotions of my mother?! Mentioning humbly that I have good height. I don't take pride in such god gifted things. For God, or almighty, whatever you say, is smarter than society. How stupid I am I to say this? For god created men and women, and they themselves create the society. Societal terms of success: height, color, academics, accumulation of money, marriage partners are their own construct of minds. They are fool and make others fool. Sachin Tendulkar, is a short height man. His success is not measured by his height !!

Let me give you another example. Take academics. Who is more successful in the eyes of society? An IAS officer or a middle-class businessman? Most of you will say that an IAS officer is more successful. Again how you came to this conclusion? Just because he or she lives in a bungalow, with beacon lights following him or her?! Society, no doubt, pays due respect to him because he or she has cracked the most toughest exam in India?! 

But again ask one more thing to yourself: does businessman work less hard than him or her in earning for himself and his family? What are the determinants of success and failure? Are they the outer constructs or inner constructs? If a businessman is happy inside, feels good to earn money, laughs with his family, have dinner in a calm and poise manner with the family members; then he is no less success than an IAS officer. 

An average and hard working student is equally successful provided he follows his heart..Heart knows all the reasons for what it wants to become. Even if he or she is an IAS aspirant, but fails to become one in future, he or she may be failure today in eyes if society, but in his or her own eyes, he or she is success if he or she follows his heart. (Pardon me for multiple he or shes. Just trying to be gender neutral in patriarchal deep psyche)

Comedy is when in societal terms, whoever earns more money or power is successful. A dear friend of mine who is an IIT Delhi alumni, laughs with me when he says, "Where IITians are supposed to work ? If he works in company , then people say, "Ah, you are an IITian , this company is not for you." 

I am marketing officer in Bihar Government , and face this issue today also. 

"Common , how an IITian can work in Bihar. Go to abroad. Do some startups, look he is in New Delhi, Gurgaon, Bangalore."

Society may term this as a failure for an IITian who is working in a state like Bihar. Who knows : who is a failure, who is a success? Deeply resonating with my mother's episode above, I would say, Almighty is smarter than society. 

There are other success and failures in eyes of society: arranged marriages vs love marriages; society may hold one in higher esteem and the other in lower esteem, a corrupt officer vs an honest one; a corrupt may be a success in eyes of society and an honest failure, because society gives too much importance to money rather than values. 

Sometimes all these make me tired, but the readers of this piece of writing should not be. What holds failure in the eyes of society, is truly a success, if you have enough good reasons to be success in your own eyes. I would recommend rather to be  a failure in the eyes of society. Forgive them, for they do not know the reasons of your heart.  

Negativity and Failure

 

Negativity and failure

Negativity breeds upon failures. Once a failure is experienced it creates a false impression in mind that a next failure waits for you in future. This can be a serious trap for anyone. It can create huge discomfort within oneself, anxiety and depression.

One very common example can be a student who is preparing for competitive examinations like IIT JEE entrance tests, NEET, IAS and so on. All such competitive exams give students multiple attempts to succeed, sometimes two, sometimes even more than four as in IAS. Despite this, anything can go wrong even for hardworking and intelligent students. One may fail to qualify even after repeated attempts. 

Then this creates a false impression in mind that you will again fail in subsequent attempts or any such future endeavours. Please avoid to fall in that trap. This fear of failure as is rightly said is gruesome phenomenon.

But it is easier said than done to be positive in such hard circumstances. Even a slight negative comment or provoke from parent, friends can fill you with anxiety. You feel helpless. 

What course of action then can be taken in such circumstances. Motivational articles, movies, videos on YouTube can be a temporary way to fill you with positive thoughts. But still how to be positive for a longer period of time? It can be a valid and potent question to ask. 

I remember I have had multiple such experiences in the past. In Kota, when I was preparing for IIT JEE I slipped by two hundred ranks in internal practice tests conducted by my institute Bansal classes. My batch was downgraded from X2 to X3. It created frustration inside me and sowed seeds of anxiety. But what I realised that I should work harder. 

And then I worked more on my subjects for three months straight. This gave me better results in next batch reshuffling tests and I was upgraded from X3 to X1. 

So, the key is to have self-belief in oneself and to take action for improving the situation. After you have done your role, you just need to wait for the results. They are not under your control, but the action always is. 

For even you face failure after you did your part for improving the situation, it is not bad. Take pride in yourself that you performed the action in improving it. Win or loss is not under our control. Recent incidences of suicides in Kota are alarming. Students must take note of the above mantra. 

Eventually this repeated exercise will nip anxiety, and discomfort in the bud itself when you face similar circumstances in future and gradually you will become stoic. 

Travel to Kyoto and Tokyo

Priorities of life/To do

1. Health- water, fruits, green vegetables, gym/exercise, yoga
2. Career- IIT, UPSC, BPSC
3. Hobbies- Book reading(biographies, self help, moral, short stories, social science; developing interest in new subjects like history, economics), writing (reflection, stories, essays)
4. Social Volunteering (enabler of change and reforms in society)
5. Travel (finding myself)
6. Teaching- Organic chemistry (logic I like)
7. Current happenings and forming an opinion/decision taking
8. Family (work life balance)
9. Practicing courage/hard decisions

Life

Life is too beautiful to let it slip anyways

Life is too short to live without any goals and ambitions

Life is filled with too many ups and downs to overthink

Saturday

𝘐 𝘢𝘮 𝘸𝘳𝘪𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘵𝘰 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘷𝘦𝘺 𝘵𝘰 𝘎𝘰𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘛𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘬 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘺𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘨𝘪𝘷𝘦𝘯 𝘮𝘦 𝘵𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘯𝘰𝘸.

𝘚𝘰𝘮𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨𝘴 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘵𝘰𝘰 𝘱𝘳𝘦𝘤𝘪𝘰𝘶𝘴 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘮𝘦. 𝘚𝘰𝘮𝘦 𝘰𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘤𝘩𝘢𝘯𝘤𝘦 𝘦𝘯𝘤𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘴 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘨𝘪𝘷𝘦𝘯 𝘮𝘦 𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘦 𝘩𝘢𝘱𝘱𝘪𝘯𝘦𝘴𝘴.

Decisions

Peculiarly, I got less than most of the things I aspired. But less is more.. According to some sayings....

A short poem : Dew and Snow

I am not the dew drop 

I do not fall on the green leaves 

with high surface tension between the leaves and me. 

I am snow 

I have formed over a lot of turbulence 

which many scientists have even failed to explained.

Teachings from Swami Vivekanand : Excerpts from the book- "Co write your fate with God"

• Increase will power and your fate line will improve
• Will power, determination and perseverance will cause fate line to grow and ascend further
• Having faith in oneself will end all miseries
• Tremendous will power and tremendous perseverance will help you reach the goal. Say, "I will drink ocean"
• You must have an ambition to become great 
• Adopt optimistic temperament- there is good in everything. Don't lament over imperfection of mind.
• Intellect is the most important thing to see things logically and plan our activities. So protect your intellect. Have no fear. 
• Accept constructive and positive criticism and shun bitter criticism. Don't get discouraged by negative criticism from others. Attain set goals by being positive and developing faith in ourselves. "I am thankful to all of those who said NO to me. It's because of them I'm doing it myself"- Albert Einstein. 
• God gives us whatever we want. Even mother does not serve food unless you ask for it. 
• Grief itself is the gift from God. It is the symbol of his compassion. 
• Give what you have to give. It will come back to you. Nature forces you to give.