Deep meaning words

 Harsh words with no real anger,

And a put-on angry stare:
These are the cues;
She seems hostile
but loves me true

What is meditation and self awareness according to Brihadaranyaka Upanishad

So Yajnavalkya basically talks about meditating on the nature of our true Self. First we begin to listen to ourselves. We reflect upon the nature of our Self. We understand more about it. Then we become more and more comfortable with ourselves. Slowly, we develop empathy for the other. We begin to help others in finding their true Selves. Indeed, that empathy will guide us through the most turbulent times in any relationship - most of all the fascinating relationship we all have with ourselves.

Brihadaranyaka Upanishad teaches us what is love?

 I din't find s convincing definition of Love other than what Brihadaranyka Upanishad tells us. Here are few excerpts taken from Wikipedia. 

Yajnavalkya's teaching to his wife is no different. At a basic level he is saying that we don't love our spouses or children or wealth, but we love ourselves. A girl is dear to her father because she is his daughter. A man is dear to a woman because he is her boyfriend. A dog is dear to a family because he is their pet. A suit is dear to a man because it is his suit. The love in a relationship comes because of the Self and not because of the inherent quality of the other. In fact, love arises out of an intimate awareness. After all, can we love something we don't know anything about?

Struggles of life

I am just a normal human being who has struggled to achieve love, happiness and career. Career wise I am an IITian who graduated from IIT Kanpur after lots of struggles. I was enrolled in prime Bansal Classes of Kota. If you have watched Kota factory then, you probably know the struggles faced by a budding engineering aspirant. 

I remember the day when my JEE rank was declared in the first attempt. I was not qualified. My mother became too nervous to see her child dreams shattered. Then I took the bold decision to drop one more year and work hard to achieve my goals. Supported by parents I took up one year course at Kota and worked hard. After ups and downs in the tests conducted at the coaching institute, I finally passed the exam. That moment was heroic to see my rank on IIT JEE portal. 

This anecdote is not unique but still a way to look upon my hardships faced in the preparation. I slipped 300 ranks in the internal batch reshuffling tests at Bansal classes. This gave rise to anxiety and negativity. the fear of failure in exam loomed over me. But then with hard work I gained success in the next reshuffling test to get promoted to the top batch. This was my share of struggle. 

Happiness is still in the journey despite setbacks. Working harder gave me higher levels of dopamine. One of my friends suggested that when you go through pain of any kind, try to involve yourself in another pain. This would relieve the earlier pain. 

This is a fair piece of advice. I was a metallurgical engineer at Tata Steel. I was not enjoying my work. I attended one of CSR activity in a nearby village and the idea of becoming a civil servant hit me. I felt that I will not have to work If I choose this work. So I resigned. That gave immense pain as I faced failures in my endeavours.

However, by God's grace I qualified Bihar State PSC exam. This gave me hope. I also enjoyed my job thoroughly. I may be a public servant in the eyes of my fellow citizens , an officer, but this has not come without fair share of further struggles.

So sometimes I feel, what is life? Is it a series of struggles? Or is the happiness wired in the struggles? 

I fail to get the answer, but still I wonder over it in my times of solitude. I look at the stars up above the sky on cloudy nights and wonder about the creations of God. This gives me a sense of ecstasy as I come to believe that God exists looking at those wonders. I also come to believe that struggles have made me the person I am today. And the happiness was not something to be achieved by reaching the destination but was in the journey. 

A short poem

Take all the pain

Take all the melody

Take all the happiness

Negative emotions

I am trying to overcome all faces of negative emotions.

Pain and Success

 Almost all roads to success are travelled with painful experiences. 

Inheritance Tax

Recent controversy on the innovative idea of introducing Inheritance tax has wider conundrums. 

Inheritance tax seeks to tax the assets and property transferred to the children of deceased parents. The government will levy 45% of the transferred income from the assets and the rest will be distributed among the children. 

By doing so, first the government is creating a mentality among the parents not to generate enough capital to be left behind for the children. Also it will lead to harassment of the children of the deceased parents. We know how tax collection in the country can be tedious and coercive for the citizens. 

Second, according to the social contract, the government is bound to offer services to the citizens who pay taxes. Does the corpus so collected has the potential to offer benefits to the children in the long run in the form of health insurance, education benefits, tax rebate? It is the larger question to ask. 

Third, the tax to GDP ratio of the country will improve only marginal by collecting such tax. Because GDP of any country is the sum total of all goods and services produced in a financial year and tax is collected after the parents are deceased who no longer contribute to goods and services production. So tax buoyancy will be marginal. 

Some benefits that can be comprehended are - social security to the children. It is the most important benefit, since deceased parents may not equally distribute wealth among their children due to large number of factors like adopted children, off springs who settled abroad may not get equal share in the distributed wealth, etc. So inheritance tax acts as Tax deducted at Source (TDS) for the deceased parents. The children will receive the remaining 55% of the asset income of the deceased parents, with the Government as the regulator. 

Nevertheless a tax on the deceased parents, will be a blow to the departed soul. Dont tax the deceased clean income , however Government can tax the unclean properties of the deceased as inheritance tax like black money tax. Spare the soul. 

 

Money or Happiness: Choice is yours

 Money is the root cause of all evil. Money brings comfort but does not bring happiness. Money makes you slave, money can bring in pride, money destroys all relationships.

However, there are some examples where money is important, for e.g. a father spends money for education of a child but a mother feeds love to his child and not money. 

A teacher provides education to a pupil, in return he gives money to the institution. 

A businessman earn money to expand his business to feed his family well. 

A politician needs money for political campaign. 

At the same time, money becomes the root cause of evil, if it is given too much importance. A family may live in bungalow, but there may be dearth of  happiness. A local mafia, naxal and gang thrives on money but the life is hell. 

Pay heed to what you are giving too importance to: money or happiness. The choice is yours. 

 

Apni shikayat darj karein

Koi bhi labhuk vikreta ke viruddha

Yaha shikayat darj kar skte hain

Tell me which dealer is not giving you grains..

Love Story 1> Part 2

They both landed their right legs simultaneously on the platform. Her leg was completely bright woven with anklets. Anirudh noticed this and his heart sank further, for the mission he was about to take in due course of time. 

“Where do you plan to meet him?" Anirudh asked hesitantly. 

"I don't know. He said that he would call me and confirm." She said a bit anxious, a drop of sweat was about to fall on her eyelids.

They both walked together. Anirudh accidently touched her hand. His heart sank a bit further, missing a beat this time. Soon they were out of the platform and she was looking here and there with revolving eyes. 

With the sensation of touch, Anirudh was trying to forget, he asked her, "Do you know this place? Otherwise in this new town, we don’t know anybody." Anirudh felt as if he has taken up a risky affair. 

"Wait, I try to call him" She said ignoring his questions. 

The phone rang and someone picked up the call. 

A very rough voice called on the other side, "So you are the one, who is responsible for all this. We will kill you too"

"Who are you, where is Sid..Siddheshwar?" Her voice as soft and supple started quivering. 

The other person hung up the phone. She looked at him in utter confusion, her facial expressions only to change soon to be filled with grief. Tears rolled down her eyes, on the cheeks, and down through her chin. Anirudh could not even wipe her tears. He felt too helpless to do so. 

However, he mustered courage to ask her, "Is everything all right?"

"Run, we need to go to his place, I don’t worry about my life, and his life is in danger." She pulled his hands towards him, and waved for a rickshaw. She gave him no time to ask further questions. Rather he kept silent and sat with her on the rickshaw. She tried to keep her legs away from him, on a small seat the rickshaw had.

She knew his place. So the rickshaw guided them through the cramped gully, as if it was a slum area to a decent middle class township. Besides township were many one floor houses. And in between ran a 12 feet road. There were a lot of people gathered at one of those houses. 

"Stay away, go aside" Anirudh broke silence, as he shouted, trying to filter through the crowd, like forward stroke a swimmer does inside water. 

She broke heavily as she saw him tied to a bench, being beaten ruthlessly by a few shoddy outlook men. She asked them to leave him. She even made an attempt to unlock his arms tied by the rope. She was completely unaware if Anirudh was beside him. 

Doubting her potential to free him from the tied ropes, Anirudh ran towards the wall, took up a long bamboo pole and asked everyone to keep apart, from the boy. He shouted and growled like a wolf. He warned everyone, if anyone came nearer to him, he would take less than a minute to strike a blow. 

 This created a tensed environment. The boy was wilted. Blood was running through his head down his swollen eyes. Anirudh's attempt to create a fear was successful. No one further dared to come near to him. He opened the rope, while the girl attempted to give him water lying on the pot nearby without worrying whether it was potable. 

"Listen, you marry someone else." He asked, trying to straighten his head in order to speak to him. Anirudh kept standing and the boy was leaning on the bench on which he was tied with many physical bruises on his face.  

"This is not worth it. In future no one will approve us." He continued slightly looked at Anirudh standing and panting. 

"And who is he? He seems to be caring for you. Why don’t you marry him? Have a settled life." His wounds were hurting him more as he proclaimed. She continued sobbing. 

Soon an ambulance dived in informed by a local onlooker. The body was kept on the stretcher for medical examination and hastily entered into the ambulance. He was too tired to open his eyes, but was alive. 

Anirudh asked her, as the ambulance left and the crowd dispersed, "Let's go from here. We should file a comprehensive FIR on the incident."

She held his hand with a firm grip and asked him to come with her to the station, without paying heed to Siddheshwar's suggestions to marry Anirudh. They both filed the FIR in a nearby police station beside the railway station. The incidence took place within its jurisdiction as it was nearby to him. 

They both sat on a public bench at the railway station waiting for the train to board. It was the evening time, and cool. Wind ruffled her outfit and hair. Anirudh was silent. Both were filled with grief. 

As he was trying to avoid looking into her eyes, she asked trying to wipe her tears, "What caste are you?"

"I am a Scheduled caste too. Please do not say that you want to marry me." 

She sat on the bench wiping the blood stains on her face. 

"I want to elope with you."

"He will be soon healthy and fit. Wait for him. Why do you want to lose him?" Anirudh looked into her eyes. 

"No, I want to repeat the mistake again by losing him and falling for you" The girl did not know why she was following Siddheshwar’s words. May be because it was in the good interests of all the three, Anirudh, Siddheshwar and the girl. 

They both ran to the same police station and filed for preventive FIR so that both lives are saved. 

The police asked the girl, "What's your name?"

Anirudh did not know her name and so he lent his keen ears to listen to her name from her. 

Love Story 1

 Anirudh was a short height person trying to find out a suitable match. He was not very outspoken. He once told his mother that now he is working, earning a good amount, so he should marry. The mother agreed upon his idea. 

Once he took upon a solo journey via train, and road. He boarded the train alone for Guwahati. 

Inside the train, he spotted his berth and laid down for a while, despite it being a day time. He took a nap. There was no one to disturb him . Soon he heard a very beautiful voice, "May I sit here?"

To this he could not deny, he said , "Please, make yourself comfortable"

The girl silently sat down. He lifted the hair strands which were falling above her eyes. Her eyes was constantly looking downward. She was too shy to initiate the conversation, Anirudh felt. 

Anirudh tried to break the silence as he found her striking beautiful. 

"Are you going to Guwahati ?"

"No" She said. This made Anirudh a bit hesitant to ask further

"Then, Where?"

"To  New Jalpaiguri" She confirmed raising her eyelids a bit and looking into his eyes for a while. 

"I see, is it your home?"

"No, I live here in Purnia."

"That is great. Why New Jalpaiguri?"

"Please do not ask me personal questions. I am bit worried. Mind your work."

Anirudh felt her words rude. She was not looking into his eyes and started trifling away with small bag that was on her lap. She took out the water bottle from the bag, poured one ounce of water into her mouth and expressed complete detachment like Lord Shiva poured the poison in his mouth completely unaffected. 

Anirudh started feeling drowsy not wanting to talk to her further. He extended his legs further as if wanting to sleep, ignoring the pain her remarks gave him. He wanted to ask her to vacate the berth so that he could lie down in a complete relaxed position. 

Soon he heard her voice, "I want to marry a guy, my parents do not want me to get married to him. So I am going to meet him without telling my parents. This is making me anxious"

Anirudh's ears got pricked. He wanted to forget the rude remarks and became curious to know about it further. 

"Why your parents do not agree for it?" I asked trying to sit again, half-lying on the berth, half occupied by the girl.

"Because I am a Brahmin. He is scheduled caste." Her words made him more curious.

"Ok. Which Brahmin you are?"

" I am Gaudiya Brahmin. Born and brought up in Kolkata."

"Are you a Bengali?" Anirudh asked trying to further invade into her privacy.

"No, My family is from Bihar. We later shifted to Kolkata."

Other co passengers were looking at them with doubts due to the engaging conversation they were having.

"Still its difficult to marry outside caste due to conservative attitude of people. We cant change the attitude." Anirudh sounded philosophical and diabolical.

But he continued, " You should go ahead if you really love him."

"No, I am planning to just meet him one last time. I can't risk his life. They will kill him" she said with watery eyes.

Anirudh tried to console her, "Elope with him. But it would be even more dangerous and risky. I am not in favour of losing the love anyways"

"Will you come with me to meet him. This will prevent any risky situation that may arise if someone sees us."

Anirudh was not very sure of this. Her emotions had caught his attention well. So he confirmed her.

" Ok. I will come with you"

They both deboarded the train at New Jalpaiguri. Anirudh had started feeling a strange feeling of affection and love for the girl. He did not want her to marry the guy she was going to meet. 

Bus diaries

 A journey from Katihar to Kursela on a public transport for the service to people can be really satisfying. 

I undertake the journey on a regular basis to keep my mind busy on people, on  farm lands, on cattle moving, on the tea sellers and so on. It makes me poignant, to observe the fearful faces, and a lot of expectations they have from the fellow people as well as the Government. 

The Government definitely works within its limits for the people. It gives them subsidised ration, cheap electricity, subsidised LPG cylinders and so on. Central and State Governments combined are responsible for the assigned work, for the people choose them once every five years. 

While travelling on the bus, I reflect, whether people are really happy from inside. 

Many persons are standing on the bus floor, while undertaking the journey.  Does it say that number of buses plying are less or the population is more ? 

Even cattle is boarded on the bus, but they are not allowed by the owner of the bus. This speaks of the economic dependence of the people on livestock, and low or nil earnings from other sources. 

Encountering same faces are difficult, that means majority who board the buses do not return back or take this mode of transport on an another day. This means a large chunk of them often migrates to nearby towns like Purnia, or neighbouring villages. 

Government must address the above socio economic issues at the earliest so that their quality of life improves.